Wednesday, October 29, 2008
a moment
Last night I went through the night time routine with my dad. As we hugged good night, he said, "thanks". I said, "what for?" He said, "for being so nice to me". That made me feel so good!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
The hunt is over!
Pat, my dad's caregiver, found my dad's college ring. She was so excited when she found it that she called me. I didn't get her message for a few hours and called her, and she was still excited. And when I got home, she was still excited!!! It was in one of his shoes in his closet. How did it get there? Tell me if you know. In the mean time, I am happy it has been found and it is safely in his desk drawer with his wallet. If he ever asks about it, I'll probably give it to him. But in the mean time, it is safe. Maybe his fingers have gotten smaller and it slipped off? hmmmm?
Sunday, October 26, 2008
wood work
hmmmm....the layout didn't go very well. :)
But here are some of my dad's wood carvings.
"Did I make that?"
Oh yeah, dad, you did!
(Somebody has to help me with these layouts!)
A new friend
My friend, Cheryl, came over on Friday to visit. She brought her 14 month old daughter, Taylor along. My dad really enjoyed their visit, as you can see! Silly smiles! :) It's amazing how a baby or toddler just bring him to life! Dogs too!
Saturday, October 25, 2008
And the hunt is on...
When my Dad first came here, going through his stuff filled up my days. Sneaking into his wallet while he showered, I was able to remove important stuff like his social security card, insurance information, and charge card. I left his driver's license in there because I knew he would know if that was missing. There has never been a problem with his wallet's contents. In fact, he has stopped putting his wallet in his back pocket.
He wears a silver necklace with a cross on it, and when I asked him how long he's had it, he told me forever. So I don't know how long he's had it. He wears a watch, and his college ring. The story I remember is that he got the ring when he graduated from Central Michigan University, I think in 1951. Somewhere along the way, it was lost. And on their 25Th wedding anniversary, my mom gave him a new one. He loved it. He was very proud of it. And the other day, I noticed it wasn't on his finger. I reactively said, "where's your ring, Dad?" He looked at his hand and said, "I never take it off". I told him that we'd find it, and changed the subject. So far, we haven't found it. I know for sure he had it on 5 weeks ago today, the day that Lisa started to come on Saturdays. After that, I don't know. I've looked through his drawers, clothes pockets, all around his bed, his closet, and even in my mom's silver cracker bowl. No luck. I know it is here somewhere, or at least I hope it is here somewhere. It could have been thrown away while he was cleaning up after a mess, but he never takes it off! Or I should say, he has never taken it off. But he obviously has taken it off. The good thing is, he hasn't mentioned it at all since I asked him about it. The bad thing is, part of me feels really responsible that it is lost. The other part of me says, it's just the way it is. Another time I can say, I like the way the other part of me thinks.
And...we went to meet my dad's new doctor yesterday. I really liked him! He was kind to me and to my dad. He listened to me! Can you believe that? A real live doctor listened to me! My dad had some blood work done, and we are going back next week to talk about that. I think this is going to be a good thing.
He wears a silver necklace with a cross on it, and when I asked him how long he's had it, he told me forever. So I don't know how long he's had it. He wears a watch, and his college ring. The story I remember is that he got the ring when he graduated from Central Michigan University, I think in 1951. Somewhere along the way, it was lost. And on their 25Th wedding anniversary, my mom gave him a new one. He loved it. He was very proud of it. And the other day, I noticed it wasn't on his finger. I reactively said, "where's your ring, Dad?" He looked at his hand and said, "I never take it off". I told him that we'd find it, and changed the subject. So far, we haven't found it. I know for sure he had it on 5 weeks ago today, the day that Lisa started to come on Saturdays. After that, I don't know. I've looked through his drawers, clothes pockets, all around his bed, his closet, and even in my mom's silver cracker bowl. No luck. I know it is here somewhere, or at least I hope it is here somewhere. It could have been thrown away while he was cleaning up after a mess, but he never takes it off! Or I should say, he has never taken it off. But he obviously has taken it off. The good thing is, he hasn't mentioned it at all since I asked him about it. The bad thing is, part of me feels really responsible that it is lost. The other part of me says, it's just the way it is. Another time I can say, I like the way the other part of me thinks.
And...we went to meet my dad's new doctor yesterday. I really liked him! He was kind to me and to my dad. He listened to me! Can you believe that? A real live doctor listened to me! My dad had some blood work done, and we are going back next week to talk about that. I think this is going to be a good thing.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Interesting....
I found this in a blog that I follow. http://www.delanydean.com/ No, I don't know who she is, but I find her to have some good information for me, or at least some things to think about. - M
10 Things to Know About Assisted Living
By Jane Gross
Dr. Cheryl Woodson is a seasoned geriatrician in Chicago Heights, Ill., who has found that she can no longer afford to accept new Medicare patients. She is also a blunt and funny woman who liberally dispenses wisdom to her elderly patients and their adult children, and herself a daughter who cared for her own mother with Alzheimer’s disease for a decade. Here’s some of Dr. Woodson’s advice on navigating the care giving maze.
1. Assisted living, a popular solution for elderly people who cannot live independently, is a “myth,” Dr. Woodson said, “a place for people who don’t exist.” Families often believe these facilities will meet all of their loved ones’ needs, enabling caregivers to focus on jobs and family, only to find this isn’t the case. Before long, the elderly resident will require more than “meals you don’t have to cook, grass you don’t have to cut and socialization,” Dr. Woodson said. At that point the elderly resident is in trouble, since assisted living facilities are not permitted by law to provide medical care and consider it to be the family’s responsibility.
2. Squaring a family’s expectations with those legal limits would require a thorough, first-hand assessment of the elderly person’s physical and cognitive health before admission to an assisted living facility. That rarely happens. New residents are admitted based on a report from their current physicians, who may not be qualified to diagnose the early signs of dementia and impending immobility or may sugarcoat the situation in order to help a desperate family. “They just need a little help,” the usual rationale for accepting elderly prospects into assisted living, is ridiculous on its face, Dr. Woodson said. “If they just needed a little help, they’d still be in the community.”
3. Instead, without verifying the physician’s report or the family’s representations, these facilities may admit residents who already need help with simple tasks like dressing or eating, or will in the very near future, and then charge extra for these services. Some do this to fill empty beds; others give residency a shot as a kindness to desperate families, Dr. Woodson said. But when the resident declines, as all of them will unless they die suddenly, more and more a la carte services mean a bigger and bigger monthly bill, or more and more work for family members who expected the opposite.
4. Coordinating all the services that the assisted living facility doesn’t provide generally falls to one sibling, Dr. Woodson noted, who then becomes overwhelmed, sacrificing more than should be expected. The solution is hiring a geriatric care manager — “They should be called rent-a-daughters,” Dr. Woodson said — adding further to the expense, until the resident and family can no longer afford this kind of accommodation and are forced to consider a nursing home.
5. Most families balk at the prospect of transferring an aging parent to a nursing home because they like the aesthetics of assisted living — the carpeted floors, overstuffed chairs and crystal chandeliers. But without round-the-clock care, many residents are “as alone at night as if they were in their own homes,” Dr. Woodson said. Other families are unwilling to break a promise to Mom or Dad never to put them in a nursing home. The spirit of that promise — to give a parent the best possible care — is what matters, Dr. Woodson said, “and sometimes that means not doing it yourself.” An aging parent’s condition may eventually require three shifts of nurses and aides, not a family member trying to take care of everything 24/7.
6. The doctors who see residents at assisted living facilities are essentially freelancers, not employees, since their fees are paid by Medicare and they also may maintain private practices. So rather than hang around the facility expecting them to answer your questions on the fly, Dr. Woodson suggested calling and arranging to see them “by appointment, not by ambush.” This consultation will not be covered by Medicare unless it coincides with a medical procedure for the resident. Still, it is essential in order to stay on top of an elderly person’s medications, some of which may be unnecessary and even dangerous, and to make decisions about which medical care improves the quality of life and which is pointless and wasteful.
7. If a parent lives in an assisted living facility, families should closely monitor the monthly pharmacy bill, less for cost than for content. Is Xanax being prescribed for anxiety? There are numerous other remedies available without the potentially dangerous side effects. What about muscle relaxants for arthritic pain? They increase confusion in the elderly and add to the risk of falls; instead, ask for pain medication and/or a heating pad. If the assisted living facility offers to have prescriptions filled and delivered by a local pharmacy — a huge convenience for family members — be sure it’s a pharmacy that insists upon periodic blood work or other tests for drugs that are supposed to be closely monitored.
8. The goal of medical care for the elderly, in Dr. Woodson’s view and the view of every geriatrician I’ve ever interviewed, is to make day-to-day life more comfortable, not to cure illness or extend longevity. Examples? A joint replacement to relieve pain and improve mobility makes sense only if the patient has the cognitive ability to complete physical therapy. Otherwise, he or she will never walk again and would be better off avoiding surgery and simply being kept comfortable. Similarly, anyone who would refuse cancer treatment because of advanced age probably doesn’t need a mammogram, Pap smear or colonoscopy. “Why draw a map to someplace we know we’re not going?” Dr. Woodson asked.
9. Apply similar standards to immunizations and vaccinations. If someone is so ill or disabled that death would be welcome, refuse the vaccine for pneumonia, long known as “the old person’s friend.” But never say no to the shingles vaccine, which can prevent an excruciating rash. “Even if someone was only going to live five more minutes, that’s the one thing I’d suggest,” Dr. Woodson says. “It’s a quality-of-life issue.”
10. Do not assume that the presenting symptom of Alzheimer’s disease will be forgetting words, losing things or other obvious examples of short-term memory loss. Often the first thing a family member will notice is an empty checking account, Dr. Woodson said, because a normally cautious and frugal person has been tricked by a get-rich-quick scheme or other scam. And like missing money, look out for pills missing from those seven-day dispensers that help people with multiple medications keep track of what they’re taking and when. Family members may find the dispensers empty and worry about overdose, Dr. Woodson noted, but often the missing pills will turn up under couch cushions or scattered elsewhere around the house. Take this as a cue that it may be time for a cognitive assessment.
10 Things to Know About Assisted Living
By Jane Gross
Dr. Cheryl Woodson is a seasoned geriatrician in Chicago Heights, Ill., who has found that she can no longer afford to accept new Medicare patients. She is also a blunt and funny woman who liberally dispenses wisdom to her elderly patients and their adult children, and herself a daughter who cared for her own mother with Alzheimer’s disease for a decade. Here’s some of Dr. Woodson’s advice on navigating the care giving maze.
1. Assisted living, a popular solution for elderly people who cannot live independently, is a “myth,” Dr. Woodson said, “a place for people who don’t exist.” Families often believe these facilities will meet all of their loved ones’ needs, enabling caregivers to focus on jobs and family, only to find this isn’t the case. Before long, the elderly resident will require more than “meals you don’t have to cook, grass you don’t have to cut and socialization,” Dr. Woodson said. At that point the elderly resident is in trouble, since assisted living facilities are not permitted by law to provide medical care and consider it to be the family’s responsibility.
2. Squaring a family’s expectations with those legal limits would require a thorough, first-hand assessment of the elderly person’s physical and cognitive health before admission to an assisted living facility. That rarely happens. New residents are admitted based on a report from their current physicians, who may not be qualified to diagnose the early signs of dementia and impending immobility or may sugarcoat the situation in order to help a desperate family. “They just need a little help,” the usual rationale for accepting elderly prospects into assisted living, is ridiculous on its face, Dr. Woodson said. “If they just needed a little help, they’d still be in the community.”
3. Instead, without verifying the physician’s report or the family’s representations, these facilities may admit residents who already need help with simple tasks like dressing or eating, or will in the very near future, and then charge extra for these services. Some do this to fill empty beds; others give residency a shot as a kindness to desperate families, Dr. Woodson said. But when the resident declines, as all of them will unless they die suddenly, more and more a la carte services mean a bigger and bigger monthly bill, or more and more work for family members who expected the opposite.
4. Coordinating all the services that the assisted living facility doesn’t provide generally falls to one sibling, Dr. Woodson noted, who then becomes overwhelmed, sacrificing more than should be expected. The solution is hiring a geriatric care manager — “They should be called rent-a-daughters,” Dr. Woodson said — adding further to the expense, until the resident and family can no longer afford this kind of accommodation and are forced to consider a nursing home.
5. Most families balk at the prospect of transferring an aging parent to a nursing home because they like the aesthetics of assisted living — the carpeted floors, overstuffed chairs and crystal chandeliers. But without round-the-clock care, many residents are “as alone at night as if they were in their own homes,” Dr. Woodson said. Other families are unwilling to break a promise to Mom or Dad never to put them in a nursing home. The spirit of that promise — to give a parent the best possible care — is what matters, Dr. Woodson said, “and sometimes that means not doing it yourself.” An aging parent’s condition may eventually require three shifts of nurses and aides, not a family member trying to take care of everything 24/7.
6. The doctors who see residents at assisted living facilities are essentially freelancers, not employees, since their fees are paid by Medicare and they also may maintain private practices. So rather than hang around the facility expecting them to answer your questions on the fly, Dr. Woodson suggested calling and arranging to see them “by appointment, not by ambush.” This consultation will not be covered by Medicare unless it coincides with a medical procedure for the resident. Still, it is essential in order to stay on top of an elderly person’s medications, some of which may be unnecessary and even dangerous, and to make decisions about which medical care improves the quality of life and which is pointless and wasteful.
7. If a parent lives in an assisted living facility, families should closely monitor the monthly pharmacy bill, less for cost than for content. Is Xanax being prescribed for anxiety? There are numerous other remedies available without the potentially dangerous side effects. What about muscle relaxants for arthritic pain? They increase confusion in the elderly and add to the risk of falls; instead, ask for pain medication and/or a heating pad. If the assisted living facility offers to have prescriptions filled and delivered by a local pharmacy — a huge convenience for family members — be sure it’s a pharmacy that insists upon periodic blood work or other tests for drugs that are supposed to be closely monitored.
8. The goal of medical care for the elderly, in Dr. Woodson’s view and the view of every geriatrician I’ve ever interviewed, is to make day-to-day life more comfortable, not to cure illness or extend longevity. Examples? A joint replacement to relieve pain and improve mobility makes sense only if the patient has the cognitive ability to complete physical therapy. Otherwise, he or she will never walk again and would be better off avoiding surgery and simply being kept comfortable. Similarly, anyone who would refuse cancer treatment because of advanced age probably doesn’t need a mammogram, Pap smear or colonoscopy. “Why draw a map to someplace we know we’re not going?” Dr. Woodson asked.
9. Apply similar standards to immunizations and vaccinations. If someone is so ill or disabled that death would be welcome, refuse the vaccine for pneumonia, long known as “the old person’s friend.” But never say no to the shingles vaccine, which can prevent an excruciating rash. “Even if someone was only going to live five more minutes, that’s the one thing I’d suggest,” Dr. Woodson says. “It’s a quality-of-life issue.”
10. Do not assume that the presenting symptom of Alzheimer’s disease will be forgetting words, losing things or other obvious examples of short-term memory loss. Often the first thing a family member will notice is an empty checking account, Dr. Woodson said, because a normally cautious and frugal person has been tricked by a get-rich-quick scheme or other scam. And like missing money, look out for pills missing from those seven-day dispensers that help people with multiple medications keep track of what they’re taking and when. Family members may find the dispensers empty and worry about overdose, Dr. Woodson noted, but often the missing pills will turn up under couch cushions or scattered elsewhere around the house. Take this as a cue that it may be time for a cognitive assessment.
Monday, October 20, 2008
surprise!
I had quite an interesting thing happen last night. I know I was sleeping, when I felt Tom sliding back into bed. I moved over so he could get in, as it seemed I was close to the edge. But wait... why was he getting in my side of the bed? Maybe I was way over on his side and he felt it would be easier to get in on my side than get me to move over? But that didn't make sense. I began to drift back to sleep, but for some reason, I reached to find Tom. Yep, there he was. And the clock said 12:45 am. But something was behind me. Did one of the kids come home and climb into bed with us? omg You guessed it, and so did I. It was my dad.
me - hey dad
dad - yes?
me - I think you came back to the wrong bed.
dad - what the hell?
He immediately scrambled up on his feet and asked "where the hell am I supposed to go now?" I got up, suddenly hoping that he had his underwear on - which he did- whew, and walked him back to his room.
dad - "Is there anyone else in there?"
me - "no, Dad, just you".
dad - "OK, night"
Yes, it was funny. It's OK to laugh. But now I have to figure this out. All the doors in the hall are shut at night, except the bathroom and our room. I feel like I need to keep ours open so I can hear him get up, check stuff, etc. Obviously, I didn't hear him get up last night. There goes that theory. There is a night light in the hall, and one in the bathroom. He gets up every night 1, 2, 3 times. Why did this happen tonight? There goes my theory about how routines help. (they really do help, but not tonight! ) There goes my thought that the lighting I have in the hall/bathroom is enough. Today, I was thinking about getting a motion sensor night light to put in his room. I thought that when he got up, the light would go on and still be on when he got back. I looked online, and the longest any of them stay on that I found was 60 seconds. No way that is long enough. Perhaps I just need to shut our bedroom door. Anyone have any other ideas?
me - hey dad
dad - yes?
me - I think you came back to the wrong bed.
dad - what the hell?
He immediately scrambled up on his feet and asked "where the hell am I supposed to go now?" I got up, suddenly hoping that he had his underwear on - which he did- whew, and walked him back to his room.
dad - "Is there anyone else in there?"
me - "no, Dad, just you".
dad - "OK, night"
Yes, it was funny. It's OK to laugh. But now I have to figure this out. All the doors in the hall are shut at night, except the bathroom and our room. I feel like I need to keep ours open so I can hear him get up, check stuff, etc. Obviously, I didn't hear him get up last night. There goes that theory. There is a night light in the hall, and one in the bathroom. He gets up every night 1, 2, 3 times. Why did this happen tonight? There goes my theory about how routines help. (they really do help, but not tonight! ) There goes my thought that the lighting I have in the hall/bathroom is enough. Today, I was thinking about getting a motion sensor night light to put in his room. I thought that when he got up, the light would go on and still be on when he got back. I looked online, and the longest any of them stay on that I found was 60 seconds. No way that is long enough. Perhaps I just need to shut our bedroom door. Anyone have any other ideas?
Thursday, October 16, 2008
What are you thinking about?
Here is a tidbit of the table talk at dinner last night -
Dad - "What are you thinking about?"
Me - (I was really thinking about nothing, but didn't want to say that)
"oh, I was thinking about all the sounds I am hearing...lawnmower behind us, the kids on the skateboards out in the front, some one's car alarm going off... What are you thinking about? and don't tell me nothing."
Dad - "I was wishing that I had a lot of money".
Me - "What would you do with all that money?"
Dad - "I'd set all my kids up so they never had to worry about money".
How sweet is that?
Dad - "What are you thinking about?"
Me - (I was really thinking about nothing, but didn't want to say that)
"oh, I was thinking about all the sounds I am hearing...lawnmower behind us, the kids on the skateboards out in the front, some one's car alarm going off... What are you thinking about? and don't tell me nothing."
Dad - "I was wishing that I had a lot of money".
Me - "What would you do with all that money?"
Dad - "I'd set all my kids up so they never had to worry about money".
How sweet is that?
Monday, October 13, 2008
Guilt
You can't believe how much guilt I have right now. Now isn't the only time, but it's bad now. I have spent the last 2 1/2 hours doing paperwork. Once in a while, I have gone out to check on my dad. I admit that I set him up in front of the TV - like a babysitter. I hate that. But there is stuff I need to get done! But I feel bad I didn't spend more time with my dad tonight. And yesterday was the day I usually give my dad a haircut and shave, but I didn't do it. I didn't have a caregiver on Saturday, and after Friday/Saturday/Sunday...I just had no more to give by Sun afternoon when I could have done it.
I never thought he'd be up as late as he was tonight. I got up at 6:30 this morning, and when I went out into the family room, there he was...all dressed and with his sun glasses on! No messes anywhere either. yeah!
Me: hey Dad. Did you know it's only 6:30?
Dad: I'm wide awake!
I went and got his regular glasses for him and told him that we'd trade. As he took off his sunglasses, he said, "it's not as dark as I thought it was".
He really wasn't wide awake. His eyelids were drooping, and he appeared to be nodding back to sleep. But it was morning for me, morning for my husband. Coffee being made, dishes being put away, noses being blown :) within a few minutes, he really was wide awake. Sooooooooooo......... breakfast at 7:00 am. Kind of messed up my schedule, but I made it OK. Anyway, no naps today, and he just went to bed. Like I said, I wasn't expecting him to be up this late.
The guilt - I know I have to get over that. But man oh man, how do I do that? Sometimes it's harder than others times. I think I like the other times.
I never thought he'd be up as late as he was tonight. I got up at 6:30 this morning, and when I went out into the family room, there he was...all dressed and with his sun glasses on! No messes anywhere either. yeah!
Me: hey Dad. Did you know it's only 6:30?
Dad: I'm wide awake!
I went and got his regular glasses for him and told him that we'd trade. As he took off his sunglasses, he said, "it's not as dark as I thought it was".
He really wasn't wide awake. His eyelids were drooping, and he appeared to be nodding back to sleep. But it was morning for me, morning for my husband. Coffee being made, dishes being put away, noses being blown :) within a few minutes, he really was wide awake. Sooooooooooo......... breakfast at 7:00 am. Kind of messed up my schedule, but I made it OK. Anyway, no naps today, and he just went to bed. Like I said, I wasn't expecting him to be up this late.
The guilt - I know I have to get over that. But man oh man, how do I do that? Sometimes it's harder than others times. I think I like the other times.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
A blessing for my dad
I arranged for Eucharistic ministers from church to come to our house and give communion to my dad. I told him about it last night, and he said, "that's so nice, honey, thank you."
They (a couple) came today and he was quite cordial and pleased with their visit. He said prayers along with them, and engaged in some chit chat with them afterwards. He asked them where they were from, if they were retired, and where they lived now. The woman asked him if he ever goes to church at St. Andrews and he replied, oh yes, every week. He also told them that he was visiting me when they asked how long he had been here.
Later in the afternoon, I asked my dad, "what's up?" He said, "I am. I had communion."
Yes, a blessing indeed.
They (a couple) came today and he was quite cordial and pleased with their visit. He said prayers along with them, and engaged in some chit chat with them afterwards. He asked them where they were from, if they were retired, and where they lived now. The woman asked him if he ever goes to church at St. Andrews and he replied, oh yes, every week. He also told them that he was visiting me when they asked how long he had been here.
Later in the afternoon, I asked my dad, "what's up?" He said, "I am. I had communion."
Yes, a blessing indeed.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Tuesday stuff
With all the busy-ness of work and home, I admit I have a hard time keeping up with it all. Last night, I was reminded that I have to keep up with it! In my basket of "stuff to do for my dad", I found an overdue bill for his health insurance. I was kicking myself! I mailed it off this morning, but all day I was fretting over it. What if his insurance is cancelled because of the late payment? That's all I need! I called the insurance company this afternoon, and he does have a 90 day grace period. whew. Scared the bejeebers out of me.
My dad's doctor is leaving the practice, so I have made an appointment for him with a new one in a few weeks. I have all the stuff to do all over again...paperwork, records transfer, telling the story once again. I hope it isn't upsetting to my dad. He did only see the original doctor 4 times, but still, here is a new one to get used to seeing...for him and for me. Will he remember? I have no idea, but probably not. I think I often assume he will remember something, or react in a certain way, and typically, it's never the case. Word is this doctor was kind to my friend's in laws, and I'm hoping the same will be true in my dad's case.
My dad's doctor is leaving the practice, so I have made an appointment for him with a new one in a few weeks. I have all the stuff to do all over again...paperwork, records transfer, telling the story once again. I hope it isn't upsetting to my dad. He did only see the original doctor 4 times, but still, here is a new one to get used to seeing...for him and for me. Will he remember? I have no idea, but probably not. I think I often assume he will remember something, or react in a certain way, and typically, it's never the case. Word is this doctor was kind to my friend's in laws, and I'm hoping the same will be true in my dad's case.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Cooler evening = a walk!
I did one of my sneaky tricks - and my dad went for a walk with me this evening! I couldn't believe it - and we even made it all the way around the block! He used his cane, and when he said, "grab a wing, chicken", I hooked my arm through his, and off we went. About half way, I noticed he stepped on his shoelace and it came untied.
Me: hey Dad, lemme tie your shoelace.
Dad: No, it's fine.
Me: I went in front of him and I bent over while reaching for his lace.
Dad: He kicked his foot around me and continued strolling.
Guess he didn't want to have his shoelace tied.
I find it quite amusing how he asserts himself at something like that. Not about being here, not about his home/car/wife, not about me making him wear "underwear". Nope, they don't seem important. But that shoelace sure was. It was in the present and that's all that matters to him.
Me: hey Dad, lemme tie your shoelace.
Dad: No, it's fine.
Me: I went in front of him and I bent over while reaching for his lace.
Dad: He kicked his foot around me and continued strolling.
Guess he didn't want to have his shoelace tied.
I find it quite amusing how he asserts himself at something like that. Not about being here, not about his home/car/wife, not about me making him wear "underwear". Nope, they don't seem important. But that shoelace sure was. It was in the present and that's all that matters to him.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
another change of attitude
You know how that saying goes that someone always has it worse than you? So true. I have heard of so many heart breaking things going around here. I am feeling very grateful, and ashamed that I have had complaints lately. I think I will always call them concerns from now on, or things to think about, or challenges. Yes, that's a good one, challenges. Challenges make you rise to the occasion. They make you examine the concern and find solutions, or come to some type of acceptance. I guess I have been doing that, but sometimes, I have been whining. Maybe not on here, but I have been in my head. So no more of that! I have absolutely nothing to complain about. And for those I know that are having challenges, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs to you all.