A Thief

Alzheimer's Disease: The Basics (taken from WebMD)

Alzheimer's disease is a condition in which nerve cells in the brain die, making it difficult for the brain's signals to be transmitted properly. Alzheimer’s symptoms may be hard to distinguish early on. A person with Alzheimer's disease has problems with memory, judgment, and thinking, which makes it hard for the person to work or take part in day-to-day life. The death of the nerve cells occurs gradually over a period of years.

What Are the Symptoms of Alzheimer's Disease?
Most patients' symptoms progress slowly over a number of years. Symptoms may not be noticed early on. Sometimes, it is only when family members look back that they realize when the changes started to occur.

Common symptoms of Alzheimer's disease include:
Impaired memory and thinking. The person has difficulty remembering things or learning new information. In the later stages of the disease, long-term memory loss occurs, which means that the person can't remember personal information, such as his or her place of birth or occupation, or names of close family members.

Disorientation and confusion. People with Alzheimer's disease may get lost when out on their own and may not be able to remember where they are or how they got there. They may not recognize previously familiar places and situations. They also may not recognize familiar faces or know what time of the day it is, or even what year it is.

Misplacing things. The person forgets where he or she put things used every day, such as glasses, a hearing aid, keys, etc. The person may also put things in strange places, such as leaving their glasses in the refrigerator.

Abstract thinking. People with Alzheimer's disease may find certain tasks -- such as balancing a checkbook -- more difficult than usual. For example, they might forget what the numbers mean and what needs to be done with them.

Trouble performing familiar tasks. The person begins to have difficulty performing daily tasks, such as eating, dressing, and grooming. Planning for normal day-to-day tasks is also impaired.

Changes in personality and behavior. The person becomes unusually angry, irritable, restless, or quiet. At times, people with Alzheimer's disease can become confused, paranoid, or fearful.

Poor or decreased judgment. People with Alzheimer's disease may leave the house on a cold day without a coat or shoes, or could go to the store wearing their pajamas.
Inability to follow directions. The person has difficulty understanding simple commands or directions. The person may get lost easily and begin to wander.

Problems with language and communication. The person can't recall words, name objects (even ones that are very familiar to them -- like a pen), or understand the meaning of common words.

Impaired visual and spatial skills. The person loses spatial abilities (the ability to judge shapes and sizes, and the relationship of objects in space) and can't arrange items in a certain order or recognize shapes.

Loss of motivation or initiative. The person may become very passive and require prompting to become involved and interact with others.

Loss of normal sleep patterns. The person may sleep during the day and be wide-awake at night.

Doesn't sound like a very nice disease to live with, does it? Yet there are millions in our country, and I assume all over the world, who live with it every day. In my part of the world, my dad lives with this every day. But the thing is, he doesn't know it.

Alzheimer's is a progressive and regressive disease. It not only continues to erode the brain's cells, but that erosion regresses the person's thoughts, memories, and skills. When I first learned of my dad's diagnosis, I sought out and found a support group for caregivers of those with Alzheimer's. The group meets once/month, and I went 4 times before my dad came to live with us. Since he's been here, I've only been able to make it 3 times. But it has been a life saver to me. I learned that those with A.D. operate out of fear. Their reality has changed and continues to change. Things don't look the way they looked, people may not be recognized, places may be strange to them, their thought process has changed. So when they act strange, say strange things, don't remember 2 minutes ago...trying to tell them what is real, convince them of something that is so confusing to them - a total waste of time. And confronting them will often bring out defensiveness on their part. They believe it is 1989. I know it's not. But why confront and try to change their minds? The results can be anger, confusion, even violence. It really doesn't matter if my dad's calendar isn't mine. Life is a lot easier, a lot calmer, and a lot happier if I just enter his world with him for those few minutes.

I have learned to validate, not agitate. If the last car that my dad had was a 1988 Taurus, then so be it (even if I know that he still has a 2006 Fusion lease car in his name). If he tells me that he goes for a walk every day, I tell him "good for you" (even though I know I have to be quite ingenious at getting him out of the house!) If he can't figure out why the floor in the bathroom is wet, I tell him "me either", as I get out the rags and pine sol once again. Validate, not agitate. A life saving technique in dealing with my dad.

I really hate Alzheimer's Disease. It has stolen my dad. Once in a while, I get a glimpse of him. He may wink at me the way he used to, and that warms my heart. He still laughs loudly. It may be inappropriate at times, but I love that laugh...it's my dad. Occasionally a memory will pop in his head - "that table used to be my mother's." There's my dad. Or when we play cards, there are days that my dad remembers how to skillfully beat me in gin rummy. He may not remember how to play every day, and he may not be able to keep score all the time, but when he does - I love it! He says silly things like "this hand is like a foot" or "who's winning?" (quite the competitive guy). Yes, I still see my dad, but it's not the same.

A.D. has robbed him of those he loves back in Michigan. It has robbed him of his independence. It is stealing the control of his body. It has stolen his memories, his judgment, his decision making skills, his motivation and his love of life.

Alzheimer's Disease is a thief.